On the North Koreans marching into Olympic Stadium (paraphrasing): “Of course the greatest athlete ever in North Korea is none other than the former Dear Leader Kim Jong Il who, according to his official bio, hit eleven holes in one in golf — not over the course of his career, mind you, but in his very first round of golf. At least two of those came off the windmill and the clown’s nose.” — Bob Costas at opening Olympic ceremonies, July 27, 2012